Jealousy is very common especially when you are in a relationship; you tend to get jealous to just about anything with no valid reason at all. This actually happens when there is no assurance from the partner that everything’s going to be alright. When you love a person, jealousy is always present in the scene. But you can actually do something about it, if you just learn to accept that the past will always remain in the past and there’s no space for it in the future.
It is always the nature of anyone who is in the relationship to always think negatively especially when it is about the comparison between past relationships. Below are some of the ways on how you can manage to treat negative thoughts of comparing your past relationships, as highlighted in save my marriage e-course by Amy Waterman:
Be realistic. Don’t over imagine a thing that as if you are not the one whom you’re partner is with. Be confident about yourself that you are God’s gift and that is the reason why your partner chooses you among anyone else. Don’t let your insecurities eat you up alive because this will just do no good in your relationship.
Let the relationship grow naturally. Don’t think that something negative will happen in your relationship especially to the newly-wed couples out there that have fears that there partners might leave them all alone someday. Never force the relationship to be mature, look forward to the days ahead of you because in each day that passes by I’m sure there are a lot of moral lessons that you will be experiencing which will be really helpful in the relationship.
Never doubt. Trust is very important in a relationship. When you love a person, you should trust your partner with all your heart and don’t entertain anything that will make the relationship experience conflicts. Past relationships should not be given priority, if you can’t leave the past behind, then it is impossible for the relationship to be successful and to grow maturely. Frequents fights will be present, and no one would surely want that, right?
Get counseling. If you are being troubled by past relationships and you think that you are breaking apart because of this I guess it is time to contact a relationship counselor for you to be able to find out on how you can stop yourself from comparing yours to past relationships and start moving on. This should not be taken for granted because either make or break the relationship you have, if you can’t keep yourself from doing to this to your partner.
Make it an inspiration. Past relationships should be taken as your inspiration on how you will improve what you have, since your past relationships weren’t successful. If people will only realize that it is called past relationships because it didn’t work out, then there will be actually no problem about it. Talking about past relationships is actually not bad at all if you will only look at it at the positive aspect and not be negative about it.
Be kind to yourself. Surely, the ex may have something that you actually don’t, well this shouldn’t be a big problem at all because you won’t have a relationship with your partner right now, if it’s not you that your partner likes. Never underestimate yourself, and love yourself even more and your partner, of course.
Negative thoughts about past relationships should not be taken seriously because it is not actually healthy to your relationship. Instead, make it just an ordinary thought and don’t give special intention about it. Be totally honest when discussing this to your partner so that this will not be brought up over and over again.
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